PETER SAGAL, HOST:
Now onto our final game, Lightning Fill in the Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill in the blank questions as they can. Each correct answer is worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?
BILL KURTIS: Josh has two. Brian has two. And Faith has three.
SAGAL: OK. Josh and Brian are tied. Brian, I'm going to arbitrarily choose you to go first. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. On Wednesday, President Biden announced plans to withdraw all troops from blank by September 11.
BRIAN BABYLON: Afghanistan.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Thursday, it was reported the D.C. police called for backup over 15 times during the riot at the blank in January.
BABYLON: The Capitol.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, hundreds of leaders from high profile companies signed an open letter against laws making it harder to blank.
BABYLON: Vote in Georgia.
SAGAL: Well, vote in a lot of places.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, Brexit advocate and former member of Parliament Nigel Farage recorded a cameo video wishing a happy birthday to blank.
BABYLON: Prince Charles, the guy who just died.
SAGAL: No, he wished a happy birthday with a straight face to someone named Hugh Janus.
FAITH SALIE: (Laughter).
SAGAL: On Sunday, golfer Hideki Matsuyama won the 2021 blank tournament.
BABYLON: The Masters.
SAGAL: Yes, indeed.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, a woman went viral on TikTok....
(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)
SAGAL: ...For telling the story of how she catered a wedding reception and got a $75 tip for blanking.
BABYLON: From marrying the client.
SAGAL: No, she got a $75 tip because she spilled a bunch of gravy on the mother of the groom. According to the server, the mother of the groom had the audacity to wear white to the wedding. So the bride was thrilled when the server accidentally spilled an entire gravy boats' worth of gravy right onto her lap. It led to the bride giving or rather slipping the server a surprise $75 tip and led to the mother-in-law getting onto the dance floor and proving that she can, in fact, do the mashed potato.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Bill, how did Brian do on our quiz?
SALIE: That is karma.
KURTIS: He had four. For eight more points, he now has 10. And he moves into the lead.
(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE SOUND EFFECT)
SAGAL: Well done, Brian. All right, you're up next, Josh. Fill in the blank. On Wednesday, a CDC advisory panel held an emergency meeting to discuss the vaccine from blank.
JOSH GONDELMAN: Johnson & Johnson.
SAGAL: Yes.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Tuesday, Egypt seized the Ever Given for unpaid bills. That's the ship that blocked the blank.
GONDELMAN: Suez Canal.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, the prosecution and defense both completed their arguments in blank's trial.
GONDELMAN: Derek Chauvin.
SAGAL: Right. That's his name.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Monday, President Biden said his $2.3 trillion blank plan would help address the global computer chip shortage.
GONDELMAN: The American Jobs Act.
SAGAL: Yeah. That's what they're calling the infrastructure plan. I'll give it to you.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, a landlord in Ireland was charged after he evicted his tenants for growing weed, and then he blanked.
GONDELMAN: Smoked it.
SAGAL: No, he kept growing the weed and started his own drug dealing business.
On Monday, disgraced movie producer blank was indicted on 11 additional counts of assault.
GONDELMAN: Harvey Weinstein.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Wednesday, crypto exchange site blank closed its first day of trading with an $85 billion valuation.
GONDELMAN: Coinbase.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: After receiving reports of a mysterious animal...
(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)
SAGAL: ...Lurking in a tree, animal control workers in Poland arrived in the scene and found blank lurking in the branches.
GONDELMAN: It was a croissant.
SAGAL: It was, Josh.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: It was a croissant. According to the officers, they approached the, quote, "mysterious tree beast" with caution. It wasn't until they got closer that they saw the baked good for what it really was and safely removed it from the tree with no one being injured by it. That was great news for the concerned neighbors because it had been in the tree for two days, and nothing is worse than a stale croissant.
GONDELMAN: (Laughter).
SALIE: It was creepy. Did you see the picture?
SAGAL: I did not see the - was it, in fact, a creepy thing that nobody would want to see?
SALIE: Because it looked like it was climbing up or down the tree.
SAGAL: But it didn't move. And people...
SALIE: No, it was ready to pounce, Peter.
SAGAL: All right then. Bill, how did Josh do on our quiz?
KURTIS: Look out for Josh. He had seven. For 14 more points, that means he now has 16 and the lead.
(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE SOUND EFFECT)
SAGAL: OK, then. So how many does Faith need to win?
BABYLON: She needs seven to win.
SAGAL: All right, Faith, a tall order, but I think you're up for it. Here we go. This is for the game. Fill in the blank. Following the apparent sabotage of a nuclear site by Israel, blank increased their uranium enrichment to 60%.
SALIE: Iran.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Wednesday, GOP leaders said they would take action if the DOJ moves ahead with a formal case against Representative blank.
SALIE: Gaetz.
SAGAL: Yes, Gaetz.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, a House panel advanced a bill to create a commission on whether to offer Black Americans blank.
SALIE: Reparations.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: Rutgers, Notre Dame and Cornell are among the universities requiring students to be blanked before classes in the fall.
SALIE: Vaccinated.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, a man in New York brought his kids along when he broke into a self-service yogurt shop and stole blank.
SALIE: Sprinkles (laughter).
SAGAL: Yes, he stole a bunch of toppings.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Thursday, Jennifer Lopez announced she was calling off her engagement to former baseball player blank.
SALIE: Alex Rodriguez.
SAGAL: Yes, A-Rod.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, child safety advocates implored Facebook to not launch a version of blank for kids.
SALIE: Oh, Instagram.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: In addition to costing more than $15 million per day while blocking the Suez Canal...
(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)
SAGAL: ...A report has blamed the Ever Given ship for a shortage of blank worldwide.
SAGAL: Garden gnomes.
SALIE: Faith, you are right again.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: Garden gnomes, the outdoor decoration that your aunt buys to let the world know she's totally fine with being single, thank you very much, are in short supply right now. Due to that ship getting stuck in the Suez Canal, the owners of the Ever Given have apologized for the shortage and admit it was probably a mistake to let that garden gnome captain the ship.
SALIE: (Laughter).
GONDELMAN: There's no such thing as a shortage of garden gnomes.
SALIE: (Laughter).
SAGAL: Apparently, there is.
GONDELMAN: It's just garden gnomes or no garden.
SALIE: They are already short.
GONDELMAN: (Laughter).
SAGAL: Bill, how did Faith do on our quiz? Did she do well enough to win?
KURTIS: She had eight right. For 16 more points, that's a total of 19. And that means she is this week's champion.
(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE SOUND EFFECT)
SAGAL: Congratulations, Faith.
SALIE: Thank you.
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