PETER SAGAL, HOST:
Now on to our final game, Lightning Fill in the Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as they can, each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?
BILL KURTIS: Well, Peter, with three points each, we have a three-way tie.
JESSI KLEIN: Woah.
SAGAL: Oh, wow.
KLEIN: Woah.
HELEN HONG: Three-way tie.
SAGAL: Woah.
HONG: What's up?
CRISTELA ALONZO: Woah.
SAGAL: This is exciting. This is exciting. I'm just going to arbitrarily, I think, choose Helen to go first.
HONG: OK.
SAGAL: The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. After the country forced down a flight carrying a dissident journalist, the EU barred planes from flying over blank.
HONG: Oh, Belarus.
SAGAL: Belarus, right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy criticized comments made by Representative blank comparing mask mandates to the Holocaust.
HONG: Oh, Marjorie Taylor Greene, is it?
SAGAL: Yes.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Monday, the White House announced it was doubling spending to help communities prepare for extreme blank.
HONG: Weather.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, police in Georgia released an advisory asking residents to stop calling 911 to report blank.
HONG: Raccoons.
SAGAL: No, loud cicadas. A new Florida law signed on Monday will fine social media platforms if they ban blanks.
HONG: Politics?
SAGAL: Close enough, politicians, yeah.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, a baseball player in Cleveland was put...
(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)
SAGAL: ...On the injured list after he broke his thumb blanking.
HONG: Hitchhiking.
SAGAL: No, taking off his shirt too aggressively. After a particularly frustrating game, Cleveland pitcher Jack (ph) Plesac was in the locker room and fractured his thumb by, quote, "rather aggressively ripping off his shirt." The team doctor isn't sure how long the right-hander - or I guess now left-hander - will be out for, but it will be at least however long it takes for the team's tailor to replace his buttons with snaps.
Bill, how did Helen do on our quiz?
KURTIS: She did four right, eight more points. She now has eleven and the lead.
(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE SOUND EFFECT)
SAGAL: All right. Jessi, why don't you go next?
KLEIN: Oh, man.
SAGAL: Fill in the blank, Jessi.
KLEIN: I'm nervous.
SAGAL: On Tuesday, prosecutors in New York convened a grand jury to consider evidence in a case against blank.
KLEIN: Donald Trump.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Thursday, Senate Republicans unveiled a counteroffer to President Biden's $2.3 trillion dollars blank bill.
KLEIN: Budget?
SAGAL: No. In this case, infrastructure. This week, the Japanese Doctors Union warned about the risk of a coronavirus variant at the 2021 blanks.
KLEIN: Olympics.
SAGAL: Yes.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Tuesday, Georgia's governor signed an executive order barring state agencies from requiring blank passports.
KLEIN: Vaccine passports.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: In a unanimous vote, the government of Quebec said the province needs its own blank immediately.
KLEIN: Government.
SAGAL: No, its own emoji. On Monday, Bill - Mayor Bill de Blasio announced that New York would not offer remote blank options in the fall.
KLEIN: School.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, Alabama overturned their decades-old ban on doing blank in schools.
KLEIN: Oh, yoga.
SAGAL: Yes.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: After he lost a bet, French President...
(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)
SAGAL: ...Emmanuel Macron was forced to blank.
KLEIN: Eat frozen food.
SAGAL: No, to invite the metal band Ultra Vomit to his residence and sit through their concert. So Macron challenged YouTube stars McFly & Carlito to put up a COVID awareness video. And he told them, if it breaks 10 million views, he would sit through a concert from grindcore band Ultra Vomit. They did. He honored the bet. There's even video of the president sitting through the concert with a smile plastered on his face, but you can tell he's not enjoying it. After all, we know Macron is really more of a Barf Boys guy.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Bill, how did Jessi do on our quiz?
KURTIS: Well, she had five more for 10 more points. She now has 13 and slips into the lead, Jessi.
(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE SOUND EFFECT)
SAGAL: All right. And how many then, Bill, does Cristela need to win?
KURTIS: Five to tie and six to win.
SAGAL: Here we go. This is for the game. Fill in the blank. GOP senators are expected to filibuster the creation of a commission to investigate the attack on the blank.
ALONZO: The Capitol.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On the one-year anniversary of his death, the family of blank visited the White House.
ALONZO: George Floyd.
SAGAL: Yes.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, the CDC reported that half of Americans are fully blanked.
ALONZO: Vaccinated.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Tuesday, two climate change activists were added to blank's board of directors.
ALONZO: Oh, science.
SAGAL: No, ExxonMobil's. After Florida banned event spaces from barring unvaccinated people, one music venue got around the prohibition by blanking.
ALONZO: By becoming a hospital.
SAGAL: No, by charging vaccinated people $18 for tickets and anyone else $999. On Thursday, U.S. blank claims fell to a new pandemic low.
ALONZO: Unemployment.
SAGAL: Right.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: On Tuesday, former Jeopardy host blank received a posthumous Emmy nomination for best game show host.
ALONZO: Who is Alex Trebek?
SAGAL: Exactly.
(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)
SAGAL: This week, a woman in Texas lost her job after an Instagram...
(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)
SAGAL: ...Video showed her blanking at the El Paso Zoo.
ALONZO: Taunting animals.
SAGAL: Not specific enough. It showed her climbing into the spider monkey enclosure to feed the monkeys Hot Cheetos.
ALONZO: Climbing into the spider monkey enclosure to feed them Cheetos.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: You have to say it before I do.
ALONZO: Oh, that's weird.
SAGAL: The paralegal lost her job after being seen jumping into the enclosure and reaching into her bag to feed Hot Cheetos to the curious monkeys. So I guess it's illegal now to give spider monkeys their best day ever.
ALONZO: Well, they like Fritos. They were offended (laughter).
SAGAL: They - that's it. Everybody knows that.
Bill, how did Cristela Alonzo do on our quiz?
KURTIS: Well, Cristela had five right, 10 more points. That means, with 13, she and Jessi are co-champions.
(SOUNDBITE OF APPLAUSE SOUND EFFECT)
SAGAL: Well done.
ALONZO: Yes.
SAGAL: Congratulations. Well done.
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